31 October 2009

All Roads Lead To Rome


First Hour In Vernazza - Il Tramonto

One of the wonderful things about the Cinque Terre is that you're almost cut off from the rest of the world. Except for a daily influx of visitors, things are pretty sleepy there. The slow pace is such a nice change, and although I missed being able to upload photos and share them, I have to admit that the break from checking email was kind of nice.

Of course, this means that once again I have a big backlog of adventures to copy and paste. So, without further ado, I give you.....the Cinque Terre:

* * *

Buon giorno from my favorite place on the planet – Vernazza!

Sigh.

And again but with more feeling.

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.

I'm telling you, this is Italy. Or at least, this is my Italy. I can't do it justice with my descriptions, so what I recommend is that if you're reading this, at some point in your life, please make an effort to come here and experience it for yourself. Plan it for the end of an Italian adventure. Do the usual touristy stuff. See the museums and artwork in Florence. Do the gondola thing in Venice. Throw the coins over your shoulder into the Trevi Fountain in Rome. Do what you have to do (or what the guide books tell you to do).

But most of all, end your vacation with a few days in the Cinque Terre.

Trust me on this one.

Karen and I arrived here at 4pm today after about six hours on three different trains that took us from Verona to Milano to Monterosso and finally to Vernazza. It was actually a pretty exciting day.

I mean, it started off with breakfast in the hotel, which wasn't really all that amazing (the cappuccino left something to be desired – well, at least there wasn't a button and a hissing sound involved). But the real adventure broke out when we asked the woman at the reception desk to call us a cab.

A few minutes later, one arrived.

Yes, it did.

So we got in, and, well, it didn't really, um, you know...move.

No, notsomuch.

The hotel was located on an extremely narrow one-way street, and a big, white delivery truck sort of got stuck trying to turn the corner at the far end. We got in the cab and proceeded to watch the big, white delivery truck try to maneuver around this corner, half lodged underneath a residential balcony (I would have been crapping my pants if I had been that homeowner). In the meantime, we also watched the meter in our cab go from zero to ten euros (approximately fifteen dollars with today's exchange rate) and we hadn't moved an inch.


Watching the Meter and the Show Up Front

Actually, I take that back. We had moved about ten feet backwards as traffic on the one-way street slowly crawled in the opposite direction towards Verona's main square. At one point, our cab driver actually got out of the car, ran up to the big, white, stuck truck and yelled at the driver, then ran back and somehow directed traffic in such a way that eventually all the drivers behind us and in front of us got out of Vicolo Tre Marchetti with no lives lost. There was a lot of screaming involved, and we ended up driving the wrong way on another one-way street in order to get headed in the right direction. But eventually we made it to the train station. It might have cost us an arm and a leg (or an eyeball, as they say in Italian) but it was a pretty exciting start to the day!

The train ride to Milano was fairly uneventful except for the Italian train employee who assumed I didn't speak the language and proceeded to have a fight with her boss right in front of us. It was pure comedy. Again, worth the price of the ticket.

At Milano Centrale we were hoping to meet up with my friend Martina as we got off the train. Unfortunately, I couldn't track her down when we disembarked, but as we were making our way through the crowds to our next platform, I suddenly saw a familiar face! So great to catch up with her! Martina is from Sicilia, but is attending school in Milano. She actually skipped class to come see us.


Catching Up With Martina at Milano Centrale

Grazie, Martina. Ci ha fatto tanto piacere vederti alla stazione. Dai, ora tocca a te. Vieni a trovarci negli Stati Uniti! Ti aspettiamo con braci aperti!

We had about an hour layover at the Milan train station, and were able to catch up with Martina. This was a huge treat for me, and it was really great for Karen to get to interact with an Italian who speaks flawless English. For once we were both involved in the conversation and laughter.

Sigh. Good times.

The train ride to Monterosso was a long one, and we were in a compartment with two Swiss ladies. At some point, all four of us dozed off (seriously boring train ride) until a couple from Australia filled out the remaining two seats. I didn't catch their names, but they were a lot of fun. All six of us got along pretty well in that small seating area, and when it was time to get off, we did our part to help the Australians find their way. Actually, the Australian-American contingent did our best to help the Swiss ladies with their luggage, and they were quite grateful.

I think this has something to do with our new president. Europeans were never grateful when 'W' was holding court.

Sigh. So good to be an American now.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, we made it to Monterosso (about 18 minutes late) but somehow barely made our train to Vernazza and made our way from the station to the room we are renting. To give you an idea of the size of the town, it takes approximately 45 seconds to walk from one end to the other. Unless there are tourists coming off the train, in which case it takes about 1 minute, 15 seconds.

Anyway. We made it. All the crowds in Venice. All the crappy wine in Florence. All the jet lag and fatigue. It was all worth it. We made it to Vernazza.

There's just something special about the Cinque Terre. I don't know how to explain it. If you've been here, you know exactly what I'm talking about. There aren't words. It just is.

We climbed the stairs to our room, checked in with Giuseppe, dropped off our bags and headed down to the water for a beer while the sun went down over the sea. It was magical. I couldn't believe that I was back in this place. With Karen.

A dream come true.

And the look on her face told me that it had lived up to her expectations. After all the times I had talked about it, she was finally here in the Cinque Terre, and it was all that she had imagined and more.

Or maybe that was just the beer.

It was pretty late in the day (and almost November) so our hiking was cut off pretty short. We made our way up one of the rocky paths for a taste of what was yet to come, and then returned to town to (a) purchase wine and (b) drink it.

The significance of this wine purchase (in addition to the wine we had with dinner and then the sciacchetrà we drank afterwards) is that until we got here, I was convinced that they were withholding alcohol content from the wine in Italy. Seriously. I drank a metric assload one night in Florence (half a bottle with Karen before dinner, half a half a bottle with Karen at dinner and then a bottle by myself while blogging after dinner) and didn't feel a thing the next morning.

Seriously. Nothing.

Erm. Notsomuch this morning. Definitely felt the room still spinning when I woke up. I'm just going to blame it on the sciacchetrà, not on the other three liters that I consumed. By the way, schiacchetrà is a local specialty. It's a sweet desert wine with high alcohol content (hubba hubba), made from the dried grapes (yes, we call them raisins). This stuff is.....DA POO!

Also, it causes hangovers.

Anyhooooooooo.....

So, yes, it was lovely to wake up with a hangover this morning. Just in time for six hours of intense hiking. I do enjoy living on the edge. Believe me. If you have a choice, do NOT drink sciacchetrà after an evening of other Cinque Terre spirits if you plan on waking up and walking along cliffs where vertigo and other sorts of dizziness might cause....life or death issues.

Okay, I'm being slightly overdramatic. Actually, no I'm not. Come and see for yourself. Some of these paths are pretty darn challenging. If you are willing to branch away from the crowded paths that connect the five villages and go up into the mountains, you will be rewarded with some amazingly peaceful adventures. You'll forget you're in Italy. In fact, if you do pass anyone (which you probably won't) they will most likely be from either Germany or France.

Oh, by the way, when I get back from this trip, I'm going to learn the French language and teach it to Karen. We are going to go there next. Just not during the middle of cyclocross season.

So today we hiked for about six hours. And then another hour to get up the stairs to our room. Okay, not that bad, but seriously, you should try climbing four flights of stairs after tackling a couple of mountains!

Wining, er, whining aside, life is GOOD.

We miss our dogs, though.

* * *

And now back to today. We're actually on a four-hour train ride to Rome right now. The Cinque Terre was an amazing stop for us, and although we weren't really eager to leave it behind, we are looking forward to exploring Roma (and getting home to our friends and family and dogs and bicycles).

Yesterday we had a pretty epic day on the trails. We actually had a game plan as far as which paths we would take and which order. And, of course, we got lost about four times and had to quickly come up with a Plan B what would get us back down off the mountain before the sun went down.

The hike from Vernazza to Corniglia, which gets crowded with tourists later in the day, was still a quiet trip along the coast and then through olive groves. We were shocked to see sections of the orchards burned by wildfires, although it wouldn't compare at all to the damage we would find later in the day.

From Corniglia, we made the climb up towards Volastra, which was full of incredible views of the yellows and greens coming from the grape plants. We even saw some of the land owners tending to their vineyards as we made our way through. Surreal.


Walking the Vineyards Above Corniglia

It was after Volastra that things started to get a little too interesting. Path number six was supposed to take us up to the main upper path that followed the ridge line. This was a great plan, except that finding path number six was almost impossible. At one point we actually ended up in the cemetery. Then we thought we found the right path and ended up between the wires of an electric fence surrounding a private vineyard. I'm not sure if the spent shotgun shells we saw on the ground were to protect the grapes from the wild boar (more on this later) or from lost Americans.

At some point we found the signs for both path number six and path number 6b. We wanted number six. And guess which one accidentally took? Right. Not number six. The trail description indicated that the path was “not well marked”. Yeah. How about not at all marked.

Karen and I started to get a little nervous as we got further and further up the mountain, away from civilization, still not really sure if we were on a path or not. There were huge brown leaves covering the ground where there might (or might not) have been a path. But most of the time we had to walk with our hands straight up in the air and try to scurry through prickly plants.

Fun times.

Much to our relief, we did come to the top of the mountain and saw the sign for path number one, which would (hopefully) take us to path number 01 and down to Riomaggiore (where hoped there would be beer).

Did I mention that our water ran out about four hours earlier? Yeah. We were thirsty and having beer hallucinations.



Oh Sweet Path to Riomaggiore. How I Missed You!

As you can see in the picture above, we did eventually find the path down to Riomaggiore, but what we saw at the start of it was kind of disconcerting. There was a gate with a sign telling us to make sure to close it behind us to keep the wild boar out.


Yeah. Um. What?

Seriously? You mean that whole time we were on the other path we could have been eaten by wild boar?

Wow. Okay.

There probably wasn't actually any real danger of being eaten by a wild boar because the area above Riomaggiore had been destroyed by wild fire. It was tragic to see. Not to mention difficult to walk through. The trails tend to be marked with red and white paint on the trees (except on path 6b, where there were no markings to speak of). This works well except when fire has consumed everything in sight.

We had to double back and climb back up a few times when we'd venture in one direction only to come to the edge of a terrace and realize that the path we were on was actually just the path used by the landowner. This went on and on for a while. About five hours in, I hit the wall and had to sit down for a Clif Bar moment.

Phew.

Anyway, needless to say, we did finally make it down to the village and ended up hopping a train back to Vernazza. Had a quick shower and then somehow made it down to the marina for beer-thirty. We watched the sun go down (which was kind of neat, knowing that it was just coming up in Olympia) and said goodbye to our new friends Paolo and Francesco.

Despite the fact that we had eaten our best meals ever in Vernazza, we were too tired to go back out for dinner that night. The thought of climbing up and down those four flights of stairs was just too much. In fact, we were both passed out by 8pm last night.

After our morning cappuccino, we caught a train to La Spezia and are now heading down to Rome for a few days. We'll make it to the hotel by about 3pm and hope to do some exploring. Maybe find a way to get our tickets to tomorrow's soccer match.

And maybe throw some coins into that Trevi Fountain thing.

For good luck.

* * *

Wow, as it turns out, we didn't need any good luck. We made it safe and sound to Rome, found our way from the hotel to the city center via bus and then metro and accidentally found a shop that sold tickets to the soccer match.

Turns out that buying tickets to a soccer match in Italy isn't as easy as finding the stadium, handing over your money and taking your tickets. First of all, they don't sell tickets at the stadium.

I know. What?

So you sort of have to wander around town and hope you stumble upon an “official ticket dealer” (which we did). Unfortunately, when we gave them our money, they didn't give us our tickets. We had to come back two hours later.

Um. Okay.

So we wandered around Rome. Found a cute little restaurant where Karen's world was rocked by some incredible Spaghetti alla Carbonara (and mine by gnocchi). Our waiter spent the entire evening watching a German Sci-Fi movie dubbed in Italian (something about space reptiles that were eating humans in a bowling alley). It was an awesome night.


Karen Above the Trevi Fountain

We also went to the Trevi Fountain (actually found it by accident while searching for beer and/or spaghetti to celebrate our almost-got-tickets situation). Anyhoo. Lots of tourists at said fountain. Couldn't even get close enough to toss coins over our shoulder for good luck and the assurance that we would return to Rome. So, instead of chucking them over the crowds, we just decided we didn't have to come back to Rome.

Anyhoo, now we are back at the hotel, wearing the free slippers they provided. The bottle of wine I just purchased downstairs cost more than a bag of dog food. And the one hour of internet I am using to upload photos right now cost more than a month of Comcast.

But the slippers are free. And we're taking them with us, dammit!

As always, you can view our new photo additions from the Big Italian Adventure RIGHT HERE (clicky click).

PS: We are still loving Italy. Looking forward to tomorrow's soccer match. And then we want to come home and see our dogs and maybe not eat pasta for a while. Just sayin.

27 October 2009

Causing A Commotion


The Legend Says To Rub Her Right Tata For Good Luck

So here we are in Verona. Very, very happy to be done with Venice. It's quiet here. There are crowds, but they are small. And they don't smell like mothballs/piss/sauerkraut. I don't know if I've always loved Verona because it's Verona or because it's not Venice.

Either way, I don't care. I like* it here.

We arrived at noon and took a taxi to the hotel. Yes, the Romeo and Juliet Hotel. It's actually a really cute place, priced right and located a block away from the Roman Arena.

And it has free wireless internet.

We went for a little walk this afternoon, hitting the main tourist spots and then wandering to the other side of the river and up to the Castel San Pietro for a view of the city from above.


A Hazy Day in Verona - View From Castel San Pietro

After exploring for about three hours, we found a phone to call home and then made our way to Juliet's balcony so Karen could get her picture taken with the statue. And here's where Italy just dropped a few notches in my book.

Don't get me wrong. I love Italy. And my Italian friends? They are wonderful. But there is definitely something wrong with some of the people here. Not all of them. Some of them. These people are making Italy a totally different experience for me. And for Karen, which is what really gets to me most.

Yes, I'm referring to homophobia.

I guess I expected it. This is, after all, home to the Pope and all that business. But I've been to Italy three times, and I've never, until today, not felt safe in my own skin. I've always had a wonderful time in Italy, mostly because the Italians have treated me so well. In fact, sometimes it felt like they went out of their way to make sure I was happy and safe.

Today we went to Juliet's balcony here in Verona, where there is a bronze statue of her likeness. As you can see by GOOGLING THE SUBJECT, the tradition is that you rub her right breast for good luck. People (men and women) have been doing it for decades (which is why you see the shiny spot).

Anyhoo. We waited our turn for a group of Spanish men and women to take their turn getting their photo taken with the statue, and then Karen got up there so I could snap a shot. It was going to be great! In fact, the photo is great.

What you can't tell (or hear) from the photo is the group of Italian men behind us that started shouting when she got up there for the photo. Seriously, my heart just about thumped right out of my chest. I thought they were going to attack us. We didn't even stay to see the rest of the attraction. We just quickly made our way out of there and down the street away from the commotion.

Seriously, it was really messed up.

Karen and I? We're nice people. We are conscious of other people's feelings and their sensitivities. But this? This was fucking ridiculous. Karen's hands were shaking when we walked back to the hotel, and me? I'm still really pissed off.

The good news is that we are moving on to my absolute favorite spot on the planet tomorrow - Vernazza and the Cinque Terre - and hopefully this will just turn into a distant memory while we are hiking on the miles and miles of scenic Ligure trails.

But anyway...in the meantime, if this post upsets you even a little bit, please remember that ballot that came in the mail about ten days ago. Approving Referendum 71 won't fix anything here in Italy, but it can at least assure some degree of equality (yeah, who knew equality had degrees?) at home.

And, as usual, the Big Italian Adventure photo collection has been updated HERE.

*Erm, PS, Karen still really likes Verona. In fact, we're about to go out to dinner and like it even more. But, um....yeah. Sigh.


It's Back


This morning we went out for coffee. We went out for coffee because our hotel has a bar, but it doesn't have a barista. For a cappuccino, you put your cup under a nozzle thing, and you push a button. Then it makes a whizzing, hissing noise, and some watery, milky substance comes out. And then something that looks like coffee comes out. And there you go.

I thought these things were illegal in Italy.

Anyway, we went out for coffee, walking into a small, quiet neighborhood. I thought we were about to enjoy an authentic Italian cappuccino experience until a Chinese woman walked behind the bar and took our order.

Turns out she makes a helluva cappuccino. And it was fun talking with her.

Also, on the way back to the hotel we walked by a hair design studio. A huge poster was lining the glass door. For a handsome sum, you can get your very own SOCCER MULLET.

I'm not kidding.

It's back!

Since we seem to be about two or three years behind the Europeans when it comes to fashion and style, we probably don't have to fear the mullet's return to the states until 2011.

Anyhoo, that was our exciting morning. We are catching a train to Verona in half an hour. We'll be staying at the - waaaaaaaait for it - Romeo and Juliet Hotel.

I know. I love Italy.

26 October 2009

Borrowing Broadband


Finalmente. Cucina Casalinga. Seriously. All Kinds of Yum.

So. Something funny happened here in Italy. A lack of internet-ness. I am paying $500 per night so Karen can have a room with a view, but I refuse to pay $9 an hour for internet. That's just robbery!

So, anyhoo, right now Karen and I are chillin like villains in Campo Santa Margherita, "borrowing" somebody's broadband. Not sure how many beers we've had (I'm thinking three apiece), but we've earned it after walking around the back streets of Venice for the last four hours. We estimated about fifteen miles. If you do the math - and you should - that's only one beer for every five miles.

Anyhoo, due to my lack of free internet (until now - and I apologize to whomever I am stealing, er, borrowing from at the moment) we have a slight bloggy backlog, which means I'm about to copy and paste the following text for your enjoyment. Enjoy!

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Reading La Gazzetta dello Sport on the Train to Venice

Sunday, October 25, 2009 – On the train to Venice right now. It's a little weird to come to Italy and then be surrounded by Americans. Apparently they have relegated us to the only-English-speaking car. Bummer. Anyhoo, Florence is but a memory. We finished off our stay with a cappuccino in the hotel bar. They were playing a Queen montage in the background. Nothing says “hey, you, wake up” like that Bicycle Race song.

And now I can't get it out of my head.

Anyhoo. Gotta go. Free juice cart is here. And sweet and salty snacks. More to come.

Monday, October 26, 2009 – Okay, so I planned on connecting to the internet and telling you all about our Venice adventures. But alas, I don't have an internet connection here in our $500 per night hotel. Actually, I do. But at $9 per hour, I have to put my foot down somewhere, right?

So, anyway, Venice. It's exactly what I remember. Crowded. Reminds me of Disneyland-meets-Vegas except with lots of cigarette smoke. Oddly enough, yesterday was the Venice Marathon. I say oddly because I was here three years ago on the same day as the Venice Marathon. Anyway, to make things even more interesting, not only is it crowded here, there are also an extra five thousand neurotic runner types limping through the twisting and turning alleys of Venice today. I'm allowed to call runners neurotic because I used to be one.

A runner, I mean.

I'm still neurotic.

Anyway, last year when I came to Venice I decided to pay out the nose for a room with a view of the Grand Canal. It's Venice. You're going to pay a lot no matter where you sleep. So I figured, I might as well pay a lot, a lot (which is slightly more than a lot) and have a view. The hotel totally came through and gave me a room with a terrace overlooking the water. It was amazing.

Of course, when Karen saw the pictures of this room, she said, “I want to stay there! I want to stay in that room!”

Not wanting to disappoint, I booked a reservation and begged and pleaded in Italian and told them how we would love, love, love them forever and ever if they gave us the same room. Never thought it would happen. And, actually, it didn't. But we did get the room right next door. Also with a terrace. And this year it comes with a funky odor. Karen and I can't quite put our finger on it. It's almost like if you left out a jar of dill pickles and they started rotting.

Or sauerkraut.

But the view is great. I will try to remember this when I see the $1000 charge on my credit card.

Oh, speaking of money, we have discovered that Karen has now spent as many euros on Italian beer and wine as she has using the public toilets. Water closets, they call them here. We also discovered that she has a bladder the size of a garbanzo bean. So if you ever have any questions about what to expect in a public restroom in Italy, you know who to ask. Karen has had the pleasure of tinkling in nearly all of them.

We also learned something else yesterday. I am allergic to crowds. It's not just that I don't like crowds. I literally break out in hives and start itching. It happened in Florence, and we thought it was just, I dunno, bed bugs or something. Notsomuch. We got off the train yesterday, ran smack dab into a wall of tourists outside the train station, and I started itching. Just like that. Then we wandered around the quiet neighborhoods, and I was fine. Next we decided to venture to Piazza San Marco, and my skin was crawling again.

Seriously, weirdest thing.

Anyway, to avoid Monday morning hives, we set the alarm and got up early this morning, making the same trip down to St. Mark's Square but with nobody on the street except Venetians going to work and kids going to school. Today our plan is to stay as far away from San Marco as possible, getting lost in some of the other neighborhoods. I've got a couple of friends that live here, and I keep calling, but they must know I'm in town, because their phone is always “unreachable”. We're kind of getting tired of eating in restaurants, and were hoping they'd invite us over for dinner tonight.

Hello, if you ever read this! Invite us for dinner tonight!

Sigh.

Actually, we had our best meal yet in a dinky little trattoria last night. Way off the beaten path in a quiet neighborhood. Loved it. And it had almost all Italians there, so we were pretty sure we'd found a gem. Best pasta I've had in a while.

Almost as good as my homemade Pasta Roni.

Kidding.

Okay, half kidding.

Also, we had a hilarious dinner conversation over spaghetti and penne, but I don't know if I can do it justice by re-writing it in the blog. It might have been one of those “you had to be there” moments. Not sure how the conversation went from “oh my, this pasta is good” to the movie “Alive” (about the airplane that crashes in the Andes where they have to eat each other to survive). Anyway, out of the blue, in total seriousness, I told Karen, “You should eat my butt first.”

And with complete sincerity she answered, “You don't think I should eat your thighs?”

To which I responded, still very serious, “No, you should eat my butt. It's plump.”

“Okay,” she said, and took another sip of wine.

Anyhoo, that's the latest and greatest from this corner of the world. Karen is taking a 9:30am nap right now, and I think I'll just keep sitting out here on the terrace far, far away from the crowds that make me itch.


Life is Rough - 9:30am Nap in Venice

* * *

Okay, back to real time now. Still sitting here in Campo Santa Margherita. Karen and I just realized that our "free" (borrowed) internet is costing us $7.50 per beer. We've had....well, anyway. It's all about principles, right?

So today has been another interesting day in Venezia. We took the olfactory tour. What I mean is that it is really easy to get lost in Venice. Luckily, it's more or less an island thingy, so you can't get too lost. And also, you can sort of smell your way back home.

We were lost in the Jewish ghetto but knew we were close to the main path when we smelled the mothballs coming from the wedding dress shop. We'd definitely been by there before. Also, the bridge that smelled like piss? A telltale sign that we were on the right track. About 300 meters (yes, we're all up with the euro measurements now) from our hotel we started to smell the rotting sauerkraut of our room. We were home!

We've also discovered that we are the only non-smokers on this entire continent.

Seriously.

People, it's gonna kill ya! I'm just sayin.

On a happy note, while we're sitting here breathing in the second-hand smoke, we're extremely happy campers, just sitting on the side of a bustling piazza, drinking our expensive beer and letting our feet rest before the long trek home.

I think we should be okay if we take a left at the pigeon poop stank near that bridge thingy....

PS: We managed to update the photo collection while borrowing this precious "free" internet. You can view photo evidence of our latest and greatest moments HERE.

24 October 2009

Hello, Sunshine! Hello, Bidet!


The Sun Makes An Appearance!

Good news from across the pond! The sun finally came out in Italy! And rumor has it that it's going to stick around for a while. The timing of this beautiful weather couldn't be better! Tomorrow morning we are heading for Venice on the high speed Freccia Rossa. Florence has been great, but we're ready to move on.

And, er, it appears that we'll actually have to wait an extra hour because daylight savings time ends in Europe tonight. An extra hour in Italy? What amazing luck!

So, in the meantime, let's see if I can update you on our latest and greatest Italian adventures. First and foremost (before the majority of the readers get bored with my stories) let me share some super exciting news.

Today I learned how to properly use a bidet!

I say “properly” because last year I accidentally peed in the bidet in Venice. When you're in a different hotel every other night, you tend to forget where the toilet is hiding when you're wandering around in the dark in the middle of the night. In Venice, I made my way through the darkness, felt porcelain, sat on the edge and, well...tinkled. Turns out there isn't a flusher thingy when it comes to the bidet, which was why I couldn't find it in the middle of the night.

Common mistake. Stop laughing.

Anyhoo, back to today's bathroom adventure. Oh! Just to put everyone's mind at ease (thanks to the free internet here at the hotel) I was able to google “how to use a bidet”. Go ahead and try it if you like. There are even videos.

Not really a big deal. Can't say that I am moved to have one installed at home, but it's good to know that the Italians are such clean-freaks when it comes to their bums.

And now on to our next order of business - a culinary update. More good news - Karen's quest for spaghetti has been fulfilled! We found a restaurant last night that offered plain ol' spaghetti and tomato sauce. No anchovies. No clams. No truffles. Just spaghetti. Karen went to bed a happy girl. Of course, she still has jet lag, so she didn't fall asleep. But while she was lying there listening to me snore, she was a happy camper.

And now onto today's happenings. We did a little more exploring across the river, as far away from the crowds of tour groups as we could possibly go. That was a nice break, although Karen was running on fumes and needed a mid-day break. Which she took.


Too Much of a Good Thing

Later in the afternoon we went over to Piazza di Willy Winky for a beer. Historians apparently call this place Piazza della Signoria, but it has a lot of statues with really oddly-shaped male body parts, so we decided to rename it.


Oh, Neptune. Seriously?

After our beer break, we walked about 20 miles till we could find just the right sticker for Karen's new Vespa. Okay, she doesn't own it yet. But she now has the sticker ready for when she does make the purchase. Then, on the way to dinner we stopped along the river and watched an impromptu cricket match down on the bank of the Arno. That was strange, but really entertaining.


Impromptu Cricket Match Along the Arno River

Anyhoo, as you can see – bidet adventure aside – we have done nothing of cultural significance here in Florence. No, we did not go to the Accademia or the Uffizi. We saw neither David nor Dante. But we did have a fantastic time and would love to come back to Florence someday. Especially now that we know how to use a bidet.

But first, on to Venezia!

23 October 2009

In Search of Spaghetti


Gelato Goodness (aka the $9 ice cream scam)

Hello from rainy Florence! Hope all is well with the rest of the world. Karen and I are fairing quite well (and doing our part to rehabilitate the supposedly struggling Italian wine industry). It's the least we could do.

Sooooo, below you will find another bit of cut-and-paste action from my journal of big happenings here in Italia. Enjoy!

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Friday October 23, 2009Buon giorno! We're sitting on a train bound for Florence right now. Actually, it's not moving. We're pretty sure that eventually it will take us to birthplace of the Renaissance. We're not exactly sure what that means, but it sounds like it will involve wine.

Kidding, kidding.

Anyway, woo, big happenings in Siena yesterday! Where to begin? How about the night before when I signed off and proceeded to fall into a sleep so deep that neither one of us woke up in time for breakfast. By the time we were showered and out the door to explore (in the rain) it was almost noon. That was some seriously good shut-eye (which, as it turns out, we would end up needing).

First order of the day was to find a cappuccino, which isn't exactly hard in this country. We wandered in towards the main piazza and found a dinky bar with nobody waiting in line. Not sure if this was a good sign, but the cappuccino was tasty enough to pull us out of our haze and send us on an expedition of the less-touristy neighborhoods of the city. It's amazing how most visitors don't venture off the main axis of tourism. Go a few blocks in either direction and suddenly you're able to experience everyday life in Siena. Good stuff.


The Obligatory Top-of-the-Tower Photo

The rain stopped just after noon, and we were able to do our touristy bit of the day, paying seven euro to climb the Torre del Mangia. Cyclocross training came in handy going up all those steps (so much easier without a 20-pound bike on my back). We got to the top, took the obligatory photos, and went back down to Il Campo for a beer.

Make that five beers.

A little after 2pm we sat down in one of the expensive little outdoor cafes lining the piazza. The service is bad, the food is worse, but the view is excellent. And not 20 seconds after we sat down, we made a couple of new friends from London – two gals named Catherine and Alex.

Our new BFFs.


Our New Friend Alex and Her Small Beer

They were a hoot. Even before the beer came. As it turns out, we spent the afternoon – and into the early evening – chatting with them over drinks. Then Alex saw a woman drinking a fancy red-colored beverage with a slice of orange (that would be campari) and ordered one for herself. And another. And another. And another. And pretty soon she invited the woman over to our table.

Meet Sara.

A few drinks later we were all old friends, and suddenly Karen and I found ourselves invited to dinner.

At 9pm.

Which, despite our late wake-up, was still kind of a stretch for our American stomachs (Karen was sound asleep behind me while I was uploading that last batch of photos before dinner). Somehow, we still managed to pull ourselves together and get out the door to meet the girls back by the main square.

And it wasn't that we were starving (which, uh, we were). The reason we didn't bail out of the whole thing and retire to our room for a Clif Bar and a good night's sleep was because Catherine and Alex had invited us to London. And, erm, we want to go to London!

So we showed up for dinner, which turned out to be a pretty traditional Italian meal. Translation – lots of wine to start the affair, and then we didn't eat till about 11pm. And when we did eat, we got a huge plate with a little tiny portion of fancy pasta with an even fancier name. I have to admit, it might have been the best food I've ever tasted. It's just that it might have also been the smallest portion I've ever seen. And the meal ended up costing us 70 euro, which, given the current exchange rate, was about the same price as gold.

We wandered back to the hotel a little after midnight and went to bed, still hungry and counting the hours to breakfast. Which brings us to today and the new adventures we're about to have in Firenze! More to come.

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Okay, soooooo, we made it to Florence. Firenze. The birthplace of that Renaissance thing. Home of the big statue of the naked guy with the big right hand and the little winkie. You know the one.

Not a whole lot to say about today because it's raining outside. We wandered around for a bit. Bought a few touristy items. Took a few touristy photos. Made big plans for hiking around and taking photos tomorrow when it's supposed to be sunny and warm. Or at least not raining.

Tonight's goal will be to find a plate of spaghetti for Karen. We have yet to go to a basic mom-and-pop home-cooked kind of place, which has kind of been a bummer. Last night we were planning on going to one in Siena, but then we met those crazy British girls and ended up spending all that coin for a few bites of something fancy that left our stomachs growling for more all night.

All Karen wants is spaghetti. The real deal. And we're going to find it here in Florence. I can feel it.

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As always, you can view our newly added photos HERE.

22 October 2009

Our First Two, Erm, Three Days


Tasty Beverages in Siena

Hello, er, ciao from Siena! Just wanted to give everyone an update of our adventure. A whole bunch of craziness happened today, which I have yet to put into words. But below you'll find the text I saved from the first couple of internet-less days. Enjoy!

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Monday, October 19, 2009 – So, we're about 35,000 feet in the air right now. And I have to pee. It's not like there aren't any toilets on this flight. It's just that, well, have you ever thought about this when you're standing in an airplane lavatory? You're peeing at 35,000 feet! Freaks me out!

So, anyway, I'm going to hold it till we get to Detroit.

Anyhoo, so far the day has gone really well. Usually when I travel to Italy, a handful of things have gone not-according-to-plan by now (like that time in Atlanta when the tram door got stuck in the closed position with a hoard of anxious passengers inside).

I'll admit, we got off to an early start. A really early start. I woke up at 3am to pee, and when I came back into the room, Karen was practically giggling and very much wide awake, “I'm too excited to sleep!” she said. “We're going to Italy today!”

So more sleep didn't really happen for me. Instead, she opened the Italian vocabulary book, and I checked online to make sure our flight was on time.

Yep, still not taking off for another six hours.

So anyway, the flight to Detroit has thus far been rather uneventful. We each took a turn at Sudoku (Karen finishing two hard puzzles before I messed up my first attempt at a medium one). We've also read two copies of Bicycling magazine and one copy of Velo News front to back (or back to front, which is how Karen reads periodicals – I learned this just today).

We were served “lunch” which was half a diet Coke and a bag of pretzels. If we wanted a PB&J sandwich, they would have gladly taken our $5. Pretzels are good.

Ooo. The plane is descending now. Must focus on not wetting myself for the next 45 minutes. More later.

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So, right now, Karen is doing laps of the Detroit airport, and I am at the gate listening to little old ladies speak Italian. We just got done consuming margaritas after tasting Kid Rock's local “Bad Ass Lager”. It was as light as water and tasted even lighter. Not exactly bad ass. Very bad and very much tasted like ass. More later.

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Once again we are cruising along at 41,000 feet. According to the map embedded in the seat-back in front of me, we are just off the west coast of France. I'm practically ecstatic. Not because we're so close to landing in Rome but because I managed to sleep the entire plane ride over. This has never happened to me before. I guess the whole wake-up-at-3am thing worked.

Okay, well, that and the two Tylenol PM I chased with a glass of red wine.

Anyhoo, I am ready for Italy!

Poor Karen, on the other hand, hasn't slept a wink. She might have except that while she was trying to dose face down on her food tray thing, the lady in front of her slammed her chair straight backwards, lodging Karen's head between the seat in the tray.

Not a happy camper.

Right now she's kicking ass playing her 347th game of solitaire. More to come.

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And now it's 6:45pm here in Cortona. Karen and I are trying desperately to stay awake long enough to grab dinner before we collapse. Karen has now been awake for 31 hours. Gotta say, she's a trooper! “Stayin' up for spaghetti!” is what she keeps muttering incoherently.

I'm still amazed at how well everything went today. My big Italian adventures always tend to go sort of sideways (which I guess makes them kind of fun or at least entertaining). I've never had a plane to or from Italy take off on time, and yet today we took off 15 minutes early and landed half an hour ahead of schedule. I know! Crazy!

Not only that, we were the very first people off the plane to clear customs! Woohoo! Of course, to make things exciting, my bag was the very last one off the plane. Nearly gave me a heart attack. But hey, at least it made it to Rome.

After we grabbed our packs, we headed over to the train station and validated our rail passes. Nothing too exciting on the train rides except when we helped an American couple figure out when they needed to get off for Orvieto. We did our good deed for the day, took turns shutting our eyes and finally made it to Cortona.

Actually, we made it to Camucia, which is where the train stops. Cortona sits way at the top of a hill, and you get up there either by bus or taxi. Unfortunately the bus wasn't going to come for another hour and half (and I hadn't peed since when I finally gave in to the urge somewhere over France) and nobody answered when I called the taxi.

By some stroke of luck, a guy from New Orleans and his wife had called their own taxi at that very moment, and we were able to share the fare. I'm not sure how things always seem to work out in Italy. Somehow they just do.

After we dropped our bags at the B&B, I took Karen on a quick tour of the town. It's small but very hilly with lots of narrow, stone paths (that they somehow fit cars through – we're not sure how). We actually haven't eaten a real meal since we ingested Detroit's version of tacos, which was sometime yesterday. Or the day before. I'm not sure at this point. So before Karen passes out from exhaustion, I better find us some sketti!

A domani.

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Wednesday, October 21, 2009 – Yes, you may have noticed that we just went from Monday to Wednesday. Yep, pretty much just skipped over Tuesday. Somewhere over the Atlantic, I think we lost it. All I know is that yesterday we woke up and it was Monday. And today we woke up and it was Wednesday. 3am on Wednesday, to be exact.

Hello, jet lag.

Karen and I went out for dinner at a small osteria last night and actually managed to stay awake till 9pm. We figured that we had totally won the jet-lag battle until we both ended up wide awake about five hours before dawn.

We stared at maps of Siena, Florence and Venice until 5am and then got up and got ready to grab some food. The problem here was that the rest of Italy was still sleeping. The bar where we were told that we could enjoy the breakfast part of 'bed and breakfast' was called Nessuno Dorme, which means 'nobody sleeps'. Well, nobody except the cafe owners.

Anyhoo. Right now we're actually sitting on a train from Chiusi to Siena. We didn't really get to stay long in Cortona, but it was enough to give Karen a taste of a sleepy hill town before moving on to the hustle and bustle of Siena.

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Day one of Siena-ness has come to an end. Gotta say, it was a pretty decent day. We wandered around for a few hours, ate some pizza in il Campo, bought some wine, met up with my friend Rodrigo for a quick chat and then went back to catch a nap before dinner.

The guy downstairs gave us the name of a restaurant frequented by the locals, which we were pretty excited about. Of course, then he went and told the rest of the tourists at our hotel the same thing, so when we got there, the dining room was actually full of Americans. The waiter did not seem at all pleased by this, but the food was good. Despite the server's wonky attitude, the night wasn't a total loss. When we went to get our coats out of the closet, I said something to the owner in Italian about how great the food was. He got all excited and sent us home with a bottle of wine!

Woot!

We'll have to taste this one tomorrow. The wine we bought today was a Chianti that just might be the worst wine ev-ar. Please refer to our faces below for a photo re-enactment of the damage we inflicted on our taste buds.


Seriously. Worst Wine Ev-Ar!

Yes, we drank it anyway. And that's all I've got for tonight. A domani.

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So that is what has happened so far (until this morning). Today has been pretty darn entertaining. We met our new BFFs Cathy and Alex from London (and some other girl named Sara from I'm not sure where) and now we're meeting them for dinner at 9pm.

So Euro, I know.

Except it's 8pm right now - Karen's passed out behind me, and I can barely keep my eyes open.

So, anyhoo, more later. And if you want to follow along, the latest photos have been added to the Flickr collection HERE.

18 October 2009

And So It Begins


All smiles at the pre-flight dinner at 13 Coins

I honestly can't believe it's finally here. Our Big Italian Adventure has been "on the horizon" for so long now that it was always something fun to dream about, but it just never felt real.

Until now.

The dogs are out at the kennel. Our bags are packed. And we're up at a SeaTac hotel watching Sunday Night Football and cramming as many Italian verb tenses into our brains as we possibly can before tomorrow morning's flight.


Italian Essentials: "Più vi- vino, più vino, per fa- per favore!"

This will be Karen's first trip to Europe, and my first Italian adventure with a companion. I've made the trip three times, but always by myself. And I've never brought a laptop before. Holy smokes, it's like you're all along on the adventure with us!


Live from SeaTac: editing photos and updating the blog

If you'd like to follow along, our adventure should look a little like this:

10/19/09 - Fly from Seattle to Detroit, depart for Rome
10/20/09 - Land in Rome, trains to Cortona
10/21/09 - Siena
10/22/09 - Siena
10/23/09 - Florence
10/24/09 - Florence
10/25/09 - Venice
10/26/09 - Venice
10/27/09 - Verona
10/28/09 - Cinque Terre
10/29/09 - Cinque Terre
10/30/09 - Cinque Terre
10/31/09 - Trains to Rome
11/1/09 - Rome (soccer match!)
11/2/09 - Fly to Amsterdam, then back to Seattle

So there you have it. Prepare yourselves for the adventure of a lifetime!

Italia! Here we come!